"Have you Got a Spray-on"

.... Have you got a Spray-on..?
That could be the replacemnet quote for "Have you got a condom".

Spray-on condoms

Scientists in Germany say they are developing a spray-on condom.
Jan Vinzenz Krause, from the Institute for Condom Consultancy, said it would be perfect for men of all sizes.
"We're trying to develop the perfect condom for men that's suited to every size of penis," he said. "We're very serious."
His team are developing a spray can into which the man inserts his penis. Then, at the push of a button, it is coated in a rubber condom.
"It works by spraying on latex from nozzles on all sides," he said. "We call it the '360 degree procedure' - once round and from top to bottom. It's a bit like a car wash."
He said the plan was to make the condom ready for use in about five seconds and claimed it would function more effectively as it would fit better and not slip off.
Mr Krause hopes the hi-tech condom, which will be available in different strengths and colours, will on the market by 2008.

From liquid Rubber to instant lover (Sorry I'm sure they have a better solgon)

9 Dead Gay Guys (2002)

9 Dead Gay Guys

Category:
Movies
Genre:
Comedy
Cast: Glen Mulhern ... Kenny
Brendan Mackey ...
Byron Steven Berkoff ...
Jeff Michael Praed ... The Queen
Vas Blackwood ... Donkey-Dick Dark

Director/Writer: ...Lab Ky Mo

Now first thing I have to say is get movies like Beautiful Thing out of your mind, this is far from any coming of age films.Its story of two lads from Belfast as they stumble their way through the London gay underworld in search of 'gainful employment'. This being the offering of sexual favours to older gay men in order to subsidize their respective giros. However, when one of the lads accidentally shags a punter (Steven Berkoff) to death, they are forced to look for 'work' elsewhere. It is then that they discover the myth of 'The Bread in the Bed' - a huge bed full of money. 'Nine Dead Gay Guys' is the outrageous but hilarious result of the ensuing caper as the lads begin the search for the elusive bed. Director Lab Ky Mo did a great job of putting together real life stories of his own friends into one very funny movie, the one liner I'll have to remmber is "She's a 7-11 (Which in brittan is a small general store) but movie means He'll take any man between the size of 7-11.It has won at gay as well as straight comedy film festivals (notably Montreal and Dublin) and the anxious straight critics needn't worry that they ought to be offended for their gay sisters. It's a tease: there are a couple of good twists about stereotypes near the end, and one of the lads realises he is enjoying the sex with men, while the other goes home to his mammy. In other words the film's biggest stereotypical statement is less about queens, dwarves, vicars, fat women, minicab drivers or black men than it is about Irishmen! Well worth the trip to the DVD store to get this one.Runtime: 83 min Rated: R